Do you wish you were young again?

A fellow pickle ball player asked my husband that question, and the two agreed they wouldn’t want to go back in time and repeat their lives.

My reaction when he told me that? Of course, I would!

Don’t get me wrong. I wouldn’t want to go back in time and live through the bad times. I would want to be like what we’ve always heard: “If I’d known then what I know now…” And to be honest, I don’t want to go back to that 17-year-old in the picture. I was immature and still growing and learning about myself and about life, so that wouldn’t be ideal.

I realize that time gives us a false perspective of the past, and we tend to maximize the good memories and minimize the bad ones. I also realize many were not blessed with good parents, good health, and good friendships like I was. Those things affect memories, and our individual personalities affect them as well. For instance, I was “bullied,” if you want to call it that, in junior high. The name calling was almost an everyday thing. “Twiggy, Toothpick, Zipper” were just a few. I was really, really skinny. “Four-eyes, Coke Bottles” were two others. I was really, really nearsighted. Needless to say, I am forever grateful for the contact lenses I started wearing when I was 15.

But guess what? There were others going through their own traumas at that time. Welcome to junior high. That age group is very ego-centric and very cruel. It’s part of the growing up process.

So, no, I wouldn’t want to return to those years. Nor would I want to return to my twenties and even early thirties.

But late thirties and early forties? Absolutely! I still look back on those years as the happiest years of my adult life. It was before my sons were teen-agers (they really do start changing around age 15). My life was busy in a good way, full of activities with the boys, our friends, our church, and work. Saturdays were the most special day of the week, and Friday nights were the best night.

It was a time before hair started graying and skin began to thin. It was a time of spending as much time as I wanted in the sunshine (which I loved) without realizing how that sun was damaging my skin and making this time of life more traumatic. It was a time when the world viewed me as a person to be recognized and appreciated instead of being treated as someone “less than” or even invisible.

Have I mentioned the number of times forty-somethings have called me “sweetie” in recent years????

We don’t get together with friends as much as we used to do. We’ve lost one of our very dear friends, and the others are involved with grandchildren and dealing with their own issues. There are far too many in our age group passing away, dealing with cancer and other health issues, and suffering because of loss of spouse or a child.

I believe strongly in making the most of your life, no matter what curve balls are thrown your way. I am a person of faith and rely on that faith for not only today but also the future. I know some reading this are in my age group but actually living their best life because of the traumas suffered in their younger years such as bad marriages involving abuse, divorce due to infidelity and/or abuse, early widowhood, loss of a young child, and more traumas than I can list. For them, this season of life represents a time of peace. Maybe not joy, but peace. One of my friends who lost a granddaughter many years ago once told me that you never get over grief, you just learn to live with it.

I guess my answer to the question reflects the very fortunate life I have had to this point. So forgive me if I seem insensitive to you when I talk about my best years.

I know I can’t go back in time, and I guess I don’t really wish I could relive those days. Yet I cannot truthfully say I don’t reflect on those times with a certain amount of wistfulness. I wish I had appreciated those years more when I was going through them, but if I live another twenty years, I’ll be wishing I had appreciated the experiences and health I am enjoying now.

It’s all relative, isn’t it?

If there is any point to this blog, I guess it’s to advise younger folks to appreciate the season of life they are living (as if they’ll take my advice) and to remind myself to be grateful for every blessing I have right now since dwelling on the past and worrying about the future robs you of joy in the present.

But if anyone has an injectable collagen that makes skin firmer and plumper permanently, a permanent hair color that never has to be re-touched, a moisturizer that erases all sun damage, and a permanent lip color that also makes lips fuller, please share that information. All women over 65 will appreciate it.

Oh, a side note here. Another embarrassing blind moment last night! I wore one of my favorite sweaters to evening services at our church. Natalie leaned forward and spoke as she adjusted the turtleneck. “Mrs. Pam,” she said, “you’ve got your sweater on inside out, but I hid the tag.”

If I could do laughing until you cry emojis with this blog, I’d have a whole line of them here. That’s the second time I’ve worn something wrong side out. But at least I didn’t try to get in the car with a stranger like I did that time at a rest area. Sheesh!

Back to my original topic. Don’t think I”m unhappy or dwelling on the past. I am enjoying this season of life in different ways than I was able to enjoy those earlier years. It’s nice to have less responsibility and more time to do things I enjoy. And it’s wonderful being a grandparent (want to see my photo gallery?) to two and step-grandparent to three bonus grandchildren.

But every now and then, I reflect on those days of pre-teenage years raising of my children, of the activities with friends, and the delicious feeling of lazy Saturday mornings.

They make me smile. I hope you have something to smile about, whether it’s the current life you’re living or some great memories of the past. Hopefully you have both.

Well, I guess it’s time to stop writing. I have to get ready for a Silver Sneakers class. LT really puts us through it–she really loves for us to do squats!

Be sure to stop by for my blog later this week. It will have a recipe as well as information about a very-well known person. Enjoy your day!